About Me

Starting my new life

I have been waiting for the last twenty years to leave my husband. I have never been that well suited to him, but once I got pregnant I thought we should give it a try. Now that the kids have left home, it's obvious that our marriage is totally over. We're going to get a divorce. I'm making sure I have all of my ducks in a row, legally speaking, before I leave so that I get everything I'm entitled too. This blog is designed to give other empty nest divorcees a place to chat and share tips and advice.


Latest Posts


Starting my new life

Can I be considered in a will as a love-child?

by Cherly Green

Throughout history there have always been children who have been conceived through extra-marital affairs, but it was often hard to prove their parentage definitely. However, with the advances in medical technology, it is now possible to use DNA testing to more accurately determine parentage and this can also affect whether you are eligible to claim on a deceased estate. 

Here are some things to help bolster your claim. 

Gather any evidence of the relationship that led to your conception

In order to get a DNA test that confirms your parentage, you'll need to get a DNA sample from a family member. This request can be a surprise and may not initially be believed. If you can provide some additional proof of the relationship, such as love letters or photos of your (potential) parents together, then this can help the family to believe that you may be a blood relative. If there are some indications that the parent did acknowledge that you were their child, such as letters mentioning you as their child, giving you regular birthday presents or giving your other parent funds to help support you, this can also help to convince the family of the relationship. 

This information can also be used in a court of law if you end up looking to a legal process to obtain a DNA sample from the family. 

Attempt informal and mediation processes initially

If you are having trouble getting the family to take you seriously, it can be a good idea to contact a lawyer. They can help you to attempt mediation and informal negotiation to help you work out if you are related and communicate what support and contact you would like to get from the family if you do prove to be related. The family can also explain any concerns that they have and you can work together to see if you can reach a reasonable solution outside of court. 

Commence legal proceedings

If you cannot progress the situation by negotiation, you may opt for legal proceedings. These can be quite expensive and if you do not turn out to be related to the family, you may need to pay for these fees yourself. The actual amount that you may be eligible for if you are related depends on the size and scope of the will, including other provisions made for children or grandchildren. 

If you would like to explore which options you have as a love-child, talk with family lawyers or solicitors. They can help you to build a case that you are a blood relative of another family and explore how much money you may be eligible for in the will.